Most of us have said yes to something because it looked like the next step. More responsibility, a bigger title, more money, the path everybody told us we were supposed to be on. Sometimes that yes costs more than we planned for, and we don't notice until we're already living in it.
When's the last time a yes cost you more than you planned for?
There's a way of thinking about this that's helped me. You carry a broader purpose through your whole life. Each season hands you an assignment for that purpose, and when the season changes, the assignment can change with it. My friend DJ Menifee heard it in a sermon and said it plainly when he sat down with me on the show: "Your purpose may still be the same in terms of the intended value and impact. But the assignment might be different because the season is different."
DJ spent 16 years working in higher education, and he owned that he'd come through "a season where I was selfish career wise." He was chasing the next title and "wasn't using discernment well," and being away from his family "was much bigger than I could have anticipated." Even after he made his move, he caught himself "still approaching it as if it was the same season with the same assignment."
That's the trap. You can change jobs and still carry the old assignment with you, and like I told DJ, that will have you looking how you looking, and I don't mean in a good way neither. Most of the time we hold on because the old assignment became who we are. DJ said it about his campus years. People knew him as the enrollment officer, the conference presenter, the board member, the guy quoted in Inside Higher Ed, and "if they don't see me as that, then who am I?"
Letting go of an assignment can feel like letting go of yourself. Your purpose was there before the title, though, and it's still there now. The new season might simply be asking for something different. For DJ, that meant paying attention to "what fills my cup up now versus what used to fill my cup up," and being able to "be still" and honor his first priorities, his faith and his family.
So sit with two questions this week. What season is this? What assignment is it? Your purpose gets to come right along with you.
The TEF Show · Why He Left Higher Ed After 16 Years. In under three minutes, DJ tells the whole thing himself: the selfish season, the sermon, and the line that named the series.
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Your 1% move before Wednesday: write your purpose in one line, the one that's followed you from job to job. Under it, write the assignment this season is handing you. If something on your calendar still belongs to your last season, circle it.
Then hit reply and send me your one line.
Know someone carrying an old assignment into a new season? Forward this to them.
If somebody forwarded this to you, you can get The Invisible Letter free every Sunday at derecco.com.
the extra.
If DJ's words landed for you, there's more where that came from. He started Hues of Leadership with his wife because, in his words, "wouldn't the world benefit from hearing their story?" Every guest brings a different vantage point and a different season of life, the hues of leadership. I had the chance to join DJ on his show. I'm episode 32. Check it out.
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The Invisible Interview · The Invisible Score · The TEF Show
